Mop All The Things

I am not a shopper. I don’t have the patience to look through racks and shelves and go to store to store. Also, I don’t like people, much. Especially large crowds of them. So, Black Friday? Is not for me. I usually only end up getting stuff for me, because I haven’t even started really thinking about Christmas presents and then I feel guilty and then there are the people. ALL OF THE PEOPLE IN EVERY STORE PLEASE NO THANK YOU.

But, there was this mop I wanted. So at 11:45 I looked online at Target and thought about buying it. It was nearly half off! And shipped free! But if I was going to buy it I wanted in my hot little hands right now. Patience is not my strong suit. It’s more like that wrinkled, poorly fitting, out of style suit that still has shoulder pads and is 18 sizes too small but you still keep in the back of your closet because what if you need it? What if you lose all the weight and 9 inch shoulder pads come back in style and you have the world’s most important interview? WHAT THEN?

I decided since I have to go right by a super Target on my way home I would run in and run out. I pulled an inch into the parking lot, saw people were still standing outside at 12:30 and turned right back around.

I stopped at the other Target by my house and no line. Huzzah! I grab my mop, I see that the line wraps around the perimeter of the store…TWICE. I go home. I get online. SURPRISE! This item is only available in stores.

I yell, I curse, I find a gift card I had forgotten about. I go back. No line! No wait! Turns out what I had in my hands the first time around wasn’t even the right one. I grab the correct mop, two Christmas gifts and I go home.

And mop my kitchen floor at 3:30 am.

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Now, if you’ll excuse me I have to mop all the things.

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